100 Things to Do in Cleveland and Beyond: Activity 27

Acticity 27: Rainbow Babies- University Hospital System

Poor little Faye had to have a minor surgery and we are so blessed to live in a place with one of the top children's medical centers in the nation. I heart Rainbow Babies. I was sooooo nervous and they were so kind and loving and helpful and they made Faye, Dave and I all feel a little more comfortable about the whole process.

So, this Cleveland activity is one that I pray you don't have to venture to, but if you do- I hope you feel good about taking your baby there. I did.

Faye checks out her new threads.


Look at the smile on that nurse! So awesome!


This was post surgery. It scared me to death to see her like this.


Just waking up.


It was like she didn't even know it happened.


Thanks Rainbow team!
Love, the Cains.

West Virginia and the Goat Attack.

Before I begin- let me give you a little background* about this zoo. It is literally in the back yard of some man's house. You have to drive on a dirt road to get there. All the animals in the zoo are former circus (or something like it) performers. There is nothing more than a chain link fence between you and a bear. The zoo keeper lets the animals roam around the zoo sometimes. You feed popcorn to the animals through a tube. It is one of the saddest places I have ever been to and possibly the scariest place that my kids have ever been to. But other than that- it was great! ;)

--Now onto the amazing story of: (duh duh) The Zoo.

If you know my kids then you know that they, namely Miles, is terrified of animals. Any animal. If Miles gets worked up enough- he can get Faye to be just as scared as he is. When we walked into the indoor part of the zoo (where the birds and snakes reside) we were surprised to see a monkey knocking on the window to say, "hello." It was kind of adorable, but being that close to an animal was making Miles a little nervous.



And then the birds started squeaking and squawking and the kids were done. So we ventured outside.

We saw and fed a bunch of animals.




Faye fell in love with some crazy little monkeys.

And she wouldn't leave them. So she sat down by them while we did a loop and looked at some of the other animals.



And then...


Ok. So this isn't actually Miles- but this picture is a good representation of what the next few minutes were like.
Let me fill you in with a little story I like to call: Being mauled by a goat.

The zoo itself is basically on a great big hill. As we were making our trek down to the bottom- Miles spotted a goat who was out of it's cage- it made Miles a little tense, but it was about 100 yards away so I told him not to worry. The goat looked up, gave us some crazy eyes and then started charging. What the?!

Miles started freaking out- he let out some piercing screams of terror and fear and was climbing up me as fast as his little legs and arm could which made Faye get crazy and do the same. At one point- I was trying to run up the hill holding both screaming kids and push the stroller, but as the goat was gaining on us- I let the stroller go whizzing down the hill and moved as quickly as I could. Maybe I would get lucky and the stroller would distract him. It was no use. I, running up a ridiculously steep dirt/rock hill with two little people on each hip, was no match for this mangy snaggle tooth of a beast.

He caught up to us. My kids screaming in fear. I may have been screaming too- I was terrified as well. And then, he reached us. I tried to kick him away, but it seemed to only aggravate him. I'm not exactly sure what happened after that. He must have disappeared into thin air- because I have no memory of him actually leaving us. But he was gone- and we made it out alive. Just barely.

I thought we would be safe inside the snake and bird house- but, of course, we weren't. The goat must have spoken to the parrots inside because as soon as we walked in- our eardrums exploded at the scary squawking of about 15 birds. My kids started screaming again. Not cool, crazy birds.

We went to the dirt lot where our car was and were about to go sit in it and wait for our friends when my kids saw the one part of the zoo they could accept: the playground.



We had other adventures as well at the zoo. Including, but not limited too:

-Worrying about the senior citizens getting mixed up with a poo-throwing monkey.
-Miles getting a little depressed when noticing how sad a lonely gorilla was in his cage. "All he has, sniff sniff, is that log to be friends with. Why does he have to be in there?" I feel ya, Miles.
-A lion (whose sign reads, "don't get too close- I'm afraid you might take one of my girlfriends" referring to the three lioness sharing his home) tearing into raw meat like it was Christmas morning. It was frightening and amazing.

It was a pretty memorable day. And looking back- it was pretty freaking hilarious, but I'm not sure that my kids have ever recovered. Or, for that matter, if they ever will.

More West Virginia later.
Loves.

*One of my very best friends in all the world lives in West Virgina and we were able to go spend some time with her and her friends over there. We had many great adventures, including laughing so hard we cried- numerous times. Love you, Abs.

David's Rescue- from my perspective.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

8:30am-

David: "Just come. My mom will watch the kids."

Me: "No. It would just be better if I stayed. Be safe, okay. If you die, I am going to be mad at you for the rest of my life."

David: "I'll be fine. Just relax."

Me: "Hey! You need to be nice to me." Dave walks out the door.

Annie comes in to bring me the keys to the car.

Me: "Is he really not coming in to say goodbye?" David walks in. He comes over to give me a hug.

David: "I love you."

Cicely: "I love you too. Just call me and tell me where you are going before you get there, okay?"

David: "We will probably go to either American Fork or Guardmans Pass, but I will call you."

...

12:30pm- "Dave. It's me. I'm just wondering where you are and how you guys are doing. Call me when you get a sec. "

1:00- Why hasn't he called me? He is in so much trouble. No, he needs this time with his friends. It's fine. He's fine. I worry to much.

4:00- They should be getting hungry soon. I bet they will be coming down off the mountain within the hour. Plus, it's going to be dark soon.

5:01- Call David- no answer. Call Annie- no answer. Call Spencer- no answer. Call Scott- no answer. Why don't I have Anna's (Scott's wife) phone number?

5:12- via text: Hey. I'm starting to get worried. Is everything alright?

Check the window. Any cars? Great, it is snowing. Is my phone on? Check the window again. No lights. Call him. No answer. Check the window...

Something is wrong. No it's not. He does this every time he goes snowboarding. He's fine.

5:45- Call Dave.

5:50- via text: It is totally dark outside. You have to be done, right? Call me ASAP.

6:05- Call Annie.

6:14- Call Dave.

6:50- This is getting out of control. Should I even be worried? I don't want to be mad at him. It's going to be fine. Right?

Call Dave.

Call Annie.

Call Scott.

Call Spencer.

6:58- via email-

Hey Joe. I know this is weird, but Dave and Spencer went snowmobiling today- I think they went up to American Fork- but, I can't get a hold of them. It has been dark for hours and I have been calling all of them all day long with no answer. I feel like 8 o'clock is really late to still be snowboarding. Do you happen to know what kind of car Spence was driving or possibly even the license plate number? I'm a worrier. And I don't want to be a widow. Please call me if you get this: 801.520.3585.
Thanks.
-Cicely

7:20- Call Dave.

7:26- Call Dave.

Something has to be wrong. It has been dark for hours and if none of them have service- they are still up on the hill. Something is wrong. No, it's not. It's fine. No, it's not. Something is wrong.

7:30- My sister, brother-in-law and nephew walk in the door.

Me: "Danny? Should I be worried? I mean I shouldn't be right? Or should I be?"

Danny: "It is most likely that there is some mechanical problem with the snowmobile and they are just having trouble putting it on the truck. I wouldn't worry just yet."

Me: "Yeah, totally. Although, I am really worried though."

Danny: "I'll drive up Big Cottonwood to Guardsman and see if I can find their car. Do you know what they were driving?"

No. I have no clue. But Danny said not to worry and I really do trust his judgment. How am I going to tell David that he can't do this anymore without him being mad at me? I can't wait for him to walk in the door so I can hug him. Maybe Anna has some clue about where they are. Maybe I can find Anna's number on facebook or something- at least she can tell me that this isn't a big deal and I can stop worrying...

7:43- Call David.

8:01- Call David.

8:10- Danny walks in- pulls me aside. "I didn't find anything. I think it is time that we call the police."

Oh shit. If Danny thinks we need to call the police then we need to call the police and if the police are involved that means that David is missing and that means that he is not coming home and that means that they either fell off the canyon wall driving down or they are stuck on the hill...in the dark...and cold... Oh, please, no.

Tears.

Danny: "Do you have any idea what car they were driving?"

Me: "No. I emailed Joe, but he hasn't called me back. I don't have anyone else's phone numbers. Spencer lives with his Dad- I could go up there and see what I can find out.

Danny: "I'll drive you."

8:15- We pull up to Spencer's house, a girl comes walking out to the driveway as we are getting out of the car.

Her: "Cicely?"

Me: "Anna?!"

We hug and cry. Hard.

Anna (between sobs): "Where are they?! I'm freaking out! I've just been home by myself so mad at him for not calling and I came up here because I thought maybe they were here. I've been here for about 30 minutes and then you pulled up."

While Anna and I cry and talk, Danny calls the police.

Me: "I'm so glad you were here. I've been trying to get your number. I just don't know what to do? I don't even know where they went or what car they are driving."

Anna: "I dropped Scott off. They are driving a big Silver truck with a big snowmobile trailer."

Our search began.

_________________________________
The next few hours was spent gathering clues about where they were, what they were driving and what they possibly had with them.

Clue #1: Joe called me back and gave us so more information about the car and the snowmobiles. He also told us that they have been out looking for Spencer past midnight more than a dozen times. This surprisingly made us feel a lot better. But not good enough to stop worrying.

Clue #2: At about 10:00 pm Anna called Scott's parents to let them know what was going on. A few minutes later Scott's mom called Anna and by a fantastic miracle he had mentioned to her that they stopped for food in Heber.

We knew at least what part of the state they were in! This was a major breakthrough for us.

I called the Summit Police Department right away.

Dispatch: "Were they driving a silver Dodge Ram with a trailer on the back?"

Me: "Yes!!!" They knew where the truck was! They knew what canyon they went to! They will know how to find them!

Dispatch: "We were just waiting for someone to call and claim the vehicle- we will send a Search and Rescue team right away."


They have a chance. I hope.

__________________________________________


I did a lot of speaking with the leader of the search and rescue team and Spencer's brother- giving and getting information about what was happening, what supplies they may have with them, descriptions of persons, snow mobiles, or any other information that might be helpful.

Anna was with me. I really liked having her there- she seemed to calm me down.

At about midnight they started the search.

Anna stayed with me and cried and we talked and cried and talked.

It was blizzarding outside and it wasn't making us feel any better.

Anna's dog was in her car and she decided to take him home and then come back up to my parent's house. The blizzard was so bad that she didn't make it to her house. She decided to go to Scott's parents house which was closer and much safer.

I don't think I've ever felt more alone.
___________________________________________

Every once in a while I would get updates from the team. No sign of him.

At 3:30AM the leader called and told me that the weather conditions were too bad- and that he had to pull his guys off the hill. The team would resume the search in the morning.

My world shattered.

Between sobs: "I don't know anything about this sort of thing. Are they going to make it through the night?"

John the leader: "Yes. As long as they built a fire, and found some sort of shelter they should be okay."

"Thank you so much."

I wish I could say that I believed him.

____________________________________________

After that phone call I was not myself. I wish I could explain how I was feeling, but I don't think I can. A part of me knew that he had to still be alive, but most of me thought that something had gone wrong and I would never see him again.

Terrible thoughts.

I sat and watched the fire. Time wasn't moving.

More terrible thoughts. Planning his funeral in my head. How could I possibly continue without him? Other terrible thoughts. The worst thought of all: How am I going to explain to Miles and Faye that they are never going to see their Daddy again? How am I going to explain that to myself?

I'm not strong enough for this.

Every so often my Mom would come upstairs from sleeping with the kids or my Dad would come in and try to comfort me. Like I said, I wasn't the same person. I was mean to my Dad. And I was uncontrollably sobbing and hysterical with my mom.

I guess I just needed to be alone and think about him.

___________________________________

I spoke to Anna a few times. She was planning on going up to where their truck was as soon as the snow stopped. We ended up going up Parley's Canyon before the storm was over. She had a few of her family members in her car and David's Dad, Sister (Aly), and Brother-in-law (Davey) joined me.

Aly and I sat in the back of the car. She was so sweet to me. She would just hug me or touch me to calm me down. Most of the car ride I was uncontrollably crying again. I tried to stop, but, I literally couldn't.

There were signs of daylight- which meant they would start the search soon.

Aly kept saying: they are going to find them.
Anna kept saying that too.

I felt like I was the only one who was going to be prepared when they told us...
____________________________________________

We got up there and the Rescue team was gathering. There were so many of them. I wanted to hug them and say 1000 thank yous, but all I could do was stand there and let my cheeks get hot and wet again.

The Sheriff gathered us and gave us a little talk about what may or may not happen. I don't really remember what he said, but it was something like, "We can't promise anything and it may not be good." I'm pretty sure that everything else he said was positive, but I don't think I got past those two things.

The men geared up and one by one left on their snowmobiles to find my husband.

More and more people showed up to help. And more and more people called and offered help. There were thousands of prayers and thoughts. and I am grateful for every single one of them.
___________________________________

At 10:15AM the Sheriff came out with his walkie-talkie and announced that they were found:

"We found all four of them and they are in good condition. They were somewhere that they shouldn't have been. We should be seeing them in about 30 minutes."

Any words I could use to describe what that moment felt like to me would never do it justice.

He was alive! I would get to hold him again! And I would never let him go. His life wasn't over. My life wasn't over.

About 45 minutes later we saw the brigade coming down the mountain. He was getting close enough to touch. As soon as they pulled into the lot- I ran to him.

"Hey," he sighed with a half smile as he pulled off his mask and hood. "I am so sorry."

I hugged him and sobbed.

I believe I was actually repeating over and over, "You don't ever get to do that to me again!" in between cries. I wasn't sure if he could understand me or not.

He just hugged me tighter and closer and said, "It's okay. I'm okay. It's okay."


________________________________________

There were a lot of things we found out after all of this had happened.

- There were avalanches near where they were.
- The Sheriff told us later that they hadn't expected them to make it through the night.
- It was literally a miracle that no one was hurt or sick. They each had some minor frostbite, but that was it.
-Not to mention everything that happened to them when they were out there.

The Team Leader and the Sheriff just kept saying how "lucky" they were.

________________________________________

I know that physically he was there and that I could see and touch him, but I think I was afraid that it was just my imagination and he would be leaving again soon.

I couldn't help but just stare at his face and be holding on to some part of him.

We got to ride down the canyon together side by side, thanks to our friend Matt Call. I heard David's side of the story. It was amazing. And awful. And wonderful. And it is something I will never forget.

______________________________________

Now, it is January, 26. This happened two and half weeks ago. For some reason, it took me a really long time to write any of this down. I started a few days after it happened and couldn't get myself to finish it. Until today. And I'm really happy that I have. Maybe now I can get past it and not cry every time I talk or think about it.

Someone told me that- although it was awful, she hopes I don't ever really get over it. So I always have that feeling of complete and total love for David in my heart forever. And I will.

I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about the situation. Too many to share. And most of them- probably too personal as well, but I will say this: I love that man. And I am so immensely grateful for the prayers and miracles that took place on that day.


Click here to get a view of what happened on David's side. David's sister, Annie, blogged this just after the event.

Before I finish, I want to add one very important thing:

Thank you a million times to the Search and Rescue team. The Wastach County Search and Rescue team are one of the best in the entire nation. And they are all volunteers. Every one of them. I am incredibly grateful for their amazing expertise and wanted to just hug each one of them that came triumphantly down the mountain that day. You guys have no idea how incredible you are and how many people your efforts affect. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Loves.
-Cicely

The Best and Worst Days of my Life.

Dearest friends-

I am just completely overwhelmed by the outpour of love, kindness, and prayers that we have received from you. I truly believe in the miracles of the gospel and am so grateful for your help and concern for my husband.

He, along with his sister and two best friends, got stuck with their snowmobiles and snowboards in the Uinta Mountains due to wind, snow and foggy conditions. We had no idea where they were. Through a small (or really big) miracle, we found their truck in Heber and sent Search & Rescue right away. They looked from about 12am-4am and had to pull their team off the mountain because the weather was too bad. I thought for sure that meant that I would never see David again. David and his friends built a snowcave to hide from the elements and made a fire from a lighter, a bandana, some alcohol wipes and a lot of tiring trips on foot to find dry wood to keep the fire going. The fire saved them. They were found by the Search & Rescue team at about 10:15 this morning. It was another miracle that no one had to lose any digits or have any severe conditions- just minor frostbite. The sheriff and the Patrol Caption just kept saying how "lucky" they were and told me, after the ordeal was over,- that they hadn't expected them to make it through the night.

I don't really know exactly how to react or to respond to what has happened, except to hug David every chance I get and to get on my knees and thank my Heavenly Father for allowing me to be with him again.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for all of your prayers.

Loves. Seriously.
-Cicely

Miles is allergic.

Miles just spent the last two hours crying and holding his tummy until he discarded about a gallon of his insides- projectile style.

I must be getting lax in what I am letting him eat- although, I don't know where we went wrong.

I have sadness in my heart and in my eyes.

it takes H1 to kNow 1

I'm pretty sure that David and I had the swine flu. or not. But all the time we were sick- neither of my kids showed any signs of problems. Until now.

Faye is sick. Really sick. She is hardly eating and I'm sure she has a temp because she is really hot to the the touch, but my thermometer is broken- so I don't know how high her fever is.

David has a PBL test coming up which, for some reason, means that one of my kids will be spending time at the hosptial no doubt. It happens that way EVERY PBL test unless my mom is here and seeing as how she is on a boat heading for the Galapagos Islands for three weeks I'm doubting she will be able to make it.

So- what do I do? The doctor's office is closed until Monday. I really don't want to go to the ER. Given her history, I don't know if I am okay with waiting until Monday to do something about it.

Any ideas? Any thermometers that can be burned after using?

A scare.

At 1:30am this morning Miles fell down he stairs. He didn't just fall down the stair- he tumbled down the stairs and crashed into the door at the bottom. Our stairs are not forgivable in anyway- they are steep and made of hardwood.

I was terrified. I heard big thuds, an even bigger thud and then a piercing scream. Upon inspection in the dark- he could still move all of his limbs and he wasn't bleeding anywhere. I cuddled him close and tried to calm him down. When I rapped my arms around him and pulled him into my chest- I felt the largest bump I've ever encountered on anyone outside of a cartoon on his head. I freaked out. I had Dave feel it and he immediately freaked out. We switched on the lights and found all sorts of bumps, scrapes, and bruises on his neck and back.

I'm pretty sure he had a concussion because he couldn't answer simple questions and he seemed pretty confused as to what happened. I wanted to take him to the ER, but David told me to wait and see what would happen.

David gave him a blessing. And then Miles fell asleep and stayed asleep all night.

When he woke up this morning, he said- "I dust fell down the stairs and I was like BUMPCH BANG BUOOSG and then I dust hurt my head and my back." I think he is okay, but his back does look like he was in a gang fight and although his bump has decreased exponentially, it is still pretty big.

I'm so glad he is okay. He could've easily broken a bone or his neck or back. I feel like banning all use of the stairs and just following him around everywhere to make sure he never gets hurt again, but I know I can't.

I'm grateful he's okay. And that David has the priesthood.

Oh no.

This week has been heartbreaking to say the least. I don't know what I'm doing wrong as a mother, but I need to figure it out. Faye was in the hospital for four days. Here is how it happened...

Miles had a runny nose and a cough. I really didn't think too much of it- he always has a runny nose. Faye got the same runny nose and cough three days later. Of course, with her being so young I was worried. It got worse and worse. It got to the point that the saline spray and booger sucker couldn't even get anything out. The really scary part was that she wasn't eating well. She would scream for food, but couldn't breathe through her nose to eat. I told myself it wasn't RSV and I really believed it. RSV only happens to a friend of a friend's kid.

Monday morning I decided that it was time to call the doctor. "I know it's dumb, but I just want her to tell me everything is okay to set my mind at ease," I told David. We had an appointment 30 minutes later.

"I don't like this. It looks like RSV to me. Has she had a fever?"
"No." Phew- must not be RSV. "Is a fever a symptom of RSV?"
"Not really. Also, she hasn't gained any weight since her last appointment three weeks ago."
"Awesome."

They took a booger sample to test for RSV and gave her a special breathing treatment to see if that would help. She told me to come back in the morning when they would have the results and we would go from there. I knew it really wasn't RSV. She just had a cold.

"She tested positive for RSV."
"Awesome."



We spent the rest of the morning and the afternoon in Hamot's ER. After some assessments and respiratory therapy the doctor had good news. "I think we are going to send you home with some medicine. Her chest sounds pretty clear and she doesn't look dehydrated so there really isn't much we can do here. Plus, you will probably be more comfortable at home." That good news lasted about five minutes. After the doctor left Faye started having these horrible coughing spells to the point that she would start choking. It was more than scary. The doctor came back in and as I was explaining the spells to her- Faye had another attack. "Oh, wow. She better stay the night so we can watch her."

The next day it seemed like she was doing a little better. They were giving her treatments every three hours and decided to try every six instead of three. If she could go six hours without a treatment we could go home. She couldn't. She sounded horrible and she still wasn't eating very well. We weighed her and she had lost weight. Something is wrong.



Then, on Thursday, she took a real turn for the worse. Not only was she sounding horrible, but she decided to stop eating all together. She went over tweleve hours without a drop of food- no boob, no bottle. My poor little baby. She seemed so hungry and was just screaming in pain. At this point I broke down.

Before this, I really thought that she was just sick and needed some help to get better, but now I knew that that wasn't the case. I honestly thought that she had just given up on life. I mean, for the past month or so- she hasn't been too keen on eating in general. I was more than worried that even when she recovered she would still be disinterested in eating. I mean- as of right now- she weighs the same as she did at her six week appointment. I wasn't going to let her give up. I had nightmares of her and I living at the hospital for the next two years with a feeding tube down her nose, but my real fear was something much worse- something that would destroy me and my family. Something I am not strong enough to deal with.

It wasn't long before the doctor decided that she needed an IV and some fluids. Luckily, David was with us at this point because I was in no place to be strong for my baby. I told David to go with her. Of course, I could hear her screaming all the way down the hall into our room. I followed the screaming and stayed in the hall until I thought they were done when the door opened. "I am going to need to call an IV team. I poked around and can't find anything." I wanted to punch someone in the face. Why didn't they have an IV team up here in the first place? She is three months old! Does she really need to be poked more than once?

The IV team came up and I decided to be in the room this time. It wasn't a good idea. I was hysterical. The lady kept asking me trivial questions like this would help me calm down. David had to answer for me. Faye wasn't any better. I just wanted someone to magically fix her. I felt like I should be able to just that as her mother, but I was failing. My baby was fading and without help soon she was going to die. Why couldn't I help her?

They had to poke her twice before they got the IV in. Not to mention the twenty minute heel prick episode that only filled one vial of blood out of three and that one vial clotted before we were done. Or the two other times that they tried taking blood from her arm and couldn't find anything. She now had at least one bandage on each limb.

The next day she was like a brand new person. She was my happy baby Faye again. She was smiling and laughing and eating and peeing. Seeing her like this was truly one of the happiest moments of my life. She did it! She was going to live. She was doing so well that the doctors gave us discharge orders. We are going home!



And we did. Faye is happy and healthy and we couldn't be more grateful for more than just her health. We have the most amazing family and friends who's prayers were the best medicine to help Faye recover. We are grateful for all of the calls/messages/help from everyone in Utah, Erie and beyond.

I think I am most grateful for my amazing mother who always seems to come to the rescue. I needed her and she came. She spent all week taking care of Miles while we were at the hospital and David was at school. And then she extended her trip to take care of me and Faye at home for a few more days. I love my mother and I don't know where I would be without her.

And for David. My world would collapse without him. He is a great husband, an amazing father, and my very best friend.



As you know, I am super protective of my kids- some might say too protective. I don't understand why these crazy near death experiences keep happening to them. As soon as I start feeling like I have everything under control- something horrible happens. Again. I feel like I have failed in my role as a mother.

I have decided that I am quarantining myself and my children until Faye is two. I can't go through this again. I'm just not strong enough.

As I said, thanks for your prayers and love. We need them.

It happened.

My worst nightmare came true on Wednesday. Miles went into anaphylaxis. I don't know what happened or what he ate, but it happened and it was the scariest moment of my life.

Here is the whole story:

9:45 am- "Mommy, my mouth hurt." I thought he was just picking at that dry piece of skin on his lip again. "Sorry, sweetie. Lets get in the car to take Daddy to school."

9:55 am- I look back at Miles in the car seat and his lip is completely swollen. What the?! "David! Grab the Benadryl!" He gave him a tablet and reassured me that everything would be fine as it usually is; giving him Benadryl is not uncommon at our house. "Crap. I forgot my phone. Pick me up at noon. Just watch him," he said. So I did.

10:00 am- We pull into the driveway. Miles' lip is so big he can barely talk and now he is crying, wheezing and coughing. I have never been more scared in my life. I know what I have to do. I scramble to get him out of the car, I grab the EpiPen and pull his pants down. "I'm sorry baby, but I have to poke you with this. It will hurt really bad, but I need you to stay still okay? I will hold you. Ready? One, two, three." Miles screams and I count to ten. "I'm so sorry Miles. We need to hurry and get you back in the car because we have to go to the hospital."

10:20 am- We are driving to the hospital and I haven't started crying yet. I am trying to stay calm. I think to myself- If his lip is still swollen that means his throat is as well. I drive faster.

10:23 am- I realize that I have no way to get a hold of Dave.

10:25 am- We pull up to the valet and I put Faye and Miles in the stroller.

10:30 am- We go the ER, a doctor comes in to give Miles some steroids. He is still crying. He may or may not have swallowed any of the medicine. He just keeps crying and saying "I sorry Mommy. I sorry Mommy."

10:35 am- I finally get him calmed down and the nurse needs to do a work-up (including a rectal temp). Miles is terrified and will not cooperate. His lip is still huge, but he isn't choking anymore. We try to put him on the scale. He freaks out. He gets double upset during the temp taking. I am still trying to stay calm. He is still crying uncontrollably. Faye is fast asleep- thank heavens.

10:45 am- We get into a room in the Emergency Department. PBS Kids and cuddles from Mom calms him down. His sippy-cup lid comes off and applejuice soaks us and Miles isn't happy about it. Awesome.

10:55 am- The doctor comes in to make Miles breathe some special epinephrine smoke and the panic attack begins again. Faye wakes up and is screaming for food. Luckily, I have a bottle of formula ready for an emergency situation that I just put in my bag this morning. As the doctor tries to "mist" Miles I try to feed Faye the bottle and hold Miles down. It doesn't work. The doctor and I switch. That doesn't work. We leave Faye to scream while I hold Miles down and she sprays him with the medicine. It takes way too long.

11:20 am- Faye is fed and seems semi-happy and Miles has finally stopped crying. The pediatrician comes in. "Because Miles' lip is still quite swollen and his voice is still horace- I want him to get an IV and stay here for a while to keep an eye on him." My response- "Really? An IV?" I really don't want to do one more thing to make him upset. "Oh yes. It's a must in this type of situation." Sadly, I give them the okay.

I don't even want to tell you about the IV. It was horrible. It was so bad that Miles started screaming something I've never heard him say before- "Oh, Gosh! Oh, Gosh!" And then continues with "It hurts! I sorry Mommy!"

Sometime after 1:00 pm- After being hunted down at school, David arrives at the hospital. Thank you Hursts. Miles falls asleep in his arms.

Things got better after David got there. We moved to the peds unit and Miles was much happier. He was either bouncing off the walls (because of the steroids) or dead asleep (due to the Benadryl). David and Miles had to stay a long night at the hospital. I believe Miles was up until just before midnight.

We still have to pump him with both for a few days, but we are all home now and everyone is fine.

It was awful.

You know, before Wednesday- his allergies were just an inconvenience really, but now- things have changed. He could've died.

I am so thankful for modern medicine. And for the power of prayer.

And for Miles. And Faye. And David.

Well, that is it. The scariest experience of my life so far. I hope and pray I never have to do it again.